I’ve been locked in battle with my youngest for weeks. It’s passionate and exasperating and, just like him, unrelenting. We’re fighting over guns.
This gun in particular...
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On his 5th birthday he was given it as a present from a well-meaning friend. I watched his face explode with delight.
A GUN!
He
has been attracted to them from an incredibly young age, which has at various
times both fascinated and confused me. We have an almost unspoken ‘no gun’ rule
in this house. I never bought my boys guns, despite my youngest's imploring. We’ve had super soakers in the pool
but no toy guns. My eldest has never really cared for them. Could not care less
if he never uses one [though, thanks to being invited to some birthday parties
recently has developed quite the interest in laser skirmish]. But my youngest
has always been into them. He fashions guns out of playdough and toilet rolls
and cricket bats and sticks found on the ground. It’s a fun game of make-believe
to him that he must have seen SOMEWHERE. Maybe tv. Maybe through friends at
play. Whatever, wherever – the boy covets the gun.
When he received the gift, my heart skipped a little. I was
polite to the giver but swiftly put the unopened box away reminding my rapt 5
year old boy that ‘Mummy doesn’t like him to play with guns’. It did not go
down well and though it has sat high up on the cupboard in the guest room ever
since, he has not forgotten about that gun.
And today he came out in full-force and threw everything he had at me. Tears. Screaming. Stamping feet. Storming out. Threats to climb up and get it. Declarations of unfairness. Promises to not point it at any people. Throaty, heart-felt pledges to only use it with a target. Begging. And the big question.
And today he came out in full-force and threw everything he had at me. Tears. Screaming. Stamping feet. Storming out. Threats to climb up and get it. Declarations of unfairness. Promises to not point it at any people. Throaty, heart-felt pledges to only use it with a target. Begging. And the big question.
‘WHY MUM??’
And to be honest, between you and me, I’m not really sure
anymore. Is it really, that big a deal for him to play with a gun? He’s kind
and loving and sensitive. His 3 year old cousin will reduce him to tears
because he won’t even defend himself against him. He is not, by nature, an
aggressive or mean child. But he loves playing with guns and I wonder... can
they ever just be a toy? Can playing with guns ever just be about fun?
We went to the Royal Show last month and he won this big
dog.
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He won it in a shooting game. The gun was a water pistol, aimed at a target which inflated a balloon but it was a gun. Am I being a hypocrite by allowing him to play that but not allowing him to play with a nerf gun that half the kids in his class have? Am I playing double standards when I let my eldest attend laser skirmish parties [where they shoot EACH OTHER] but not let my youngest shoot a foam dart at a target?
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He won it in a shooting game. The gun was a water pistol, aimed at a target which inflated a balloon but it was a gun. Am I being a hypocrite by allowing him to play that but not allowing him to play with a nerf gun that half the kids in his class have? Am I playing double standards when I let my eldest attend laser skirmish parties [where they shoot EACH OTHER] but not let my youngest shoot a foam dart at a target?
Where is the line and have I already crossed it?
